Wake Up Dark One

Take these colors in my soul
Ring them out and lay them down
Place them at your feet and look
What do you see?
Another world inside two places at once
How can this be?
A portal within the gateway of the mind
One side shakes and holds the chaos
Wishing to burst free
To be released and thrust forward
Needing for the world to see
What lives beneath the surface?
Just one hard breath from the divine
Breathe deep and pull me in
Hear the cry of death inside
Tamed and held just out of reach
Are you afraid?
You should be
For the hunt is on and you’ve set me loose
To run raging through this plane
No catching me now
I’ll slip through your fingers

Wake up dark son of mine
Because I’ve got something to tell you
Change is coming to take your life
The storm is brewing
Keep your head now
You’ll take it like a man this time

Quenching the thirst for death as I taunt and dive down
I’m right behind you now with an evil grin
You hold still listening
The beat of your heart is deafening
A soft tongue drawn across your neck
Warm breath against your spine
The hairs stand up I moan in ecstasy
My, aren’t you innocent?
I shall corrupt you, make you mine
Rooted, you keep eyes forward
Afraid to look while I trace a nail down your jaw
I slip my hand into your shirt caressing your chest
Smelling the soap on your shoulder
I watch your eyes roll back
Your breath coming in short gasps

Wake up dark son of mine
Because I’ve got something to tell you
Change is coming to take your life
The storm is brewing
Keep your head now
You’ll take it like a man this time

You tremble as eyelids flutter closed
Beg me for your release
I circle you, touching you
Hair, skin, nails positively jumping
I turn from you and take a few steps
I hear you follow
You are under my spell
Your soul’s for sale and I’ve made my bid
Oh yes, eternity with me
Feasts and bounty never ending
You only need slake my thirst
I glance over my shoulder
But I don’t need to look to see
You want me don’t you?
A throaty laugh rings like a bell

Wake up dark son of mine
Because I’ve got something to tell you
Change is coming to take your life
The storm is brewing
Keep your head now
You’ll take it like a man this time

My hips begin to sway slowly
I close my eyes and dance further off
Pulling you off the path
You wonder if this is dream
Do you remember me?
I’ve been visiting you
Watching you sleep so peacefully
I almost pitied you it was so easy
Now here you stand before me
On the verge of immortality
I’ll make you a God
A God that worships only me
I’ll give you a glimpse of heaven
You’ll find it in my arms
While I sink my claws in you
Reveling in delight

Wake up dark son of mine
Because I’ve got something to tell you
Change is coming to take your life
The storm is brewing
Keep your head now
You’ll take it like a man this time

I watch your halo slip and fall
You don’t even notice it shatter on the ground
Now you see my true colors don’t you?
As you take your place among the infinite
A wicked leer paints your features
And I am filled with hellish pride
You make it so easy to murder
You’ll thank me when I’m through
Oh yes, I’m guilty
But have you begged my mercy?
I leave your fate up to you
Do you want redemption?
Or will you follow me to the end while I eat you alive?
I don’t want a martyr by my side

Wake up dark son of mine
Because I’ve got something to tell you
Change is coming to take your life
The storm is brewing
Keep your head now
You’ll take it like a man this time

The pressure is building and your body shudders
I take your hands and press them down
You offer no resistance
I feel you willing, eager
Lost in the sweetness of my fruit
Our bodies reach out as one
In that moment of fire and fury
I pierce you as you pierce me

Wake up dark one of mine
I’ve got something to tell you
The change has come to take your life
Come my child, the storm beckons
Take your place with the divine
You’ll take it like a God in time

Crush

Standing in the shadows
I watch your every move
With a wicked grin
Passing across my face
My tongue darts out
To lick my lips
You don’t know me yet
But I guarantee
You’ve never met a girl like me

Emerald eyes shine
As I follow close behind
I can smell your skin
The musk of sweat
The aroma of life itself
Coursing through your veins
You don’t see me yet
But I guarantee
You’ve never met a girl like me

A small hand extends
My fingers caress the air
A mere inch away
I trace your shape from behind
I linger there, getting closer
One hard breath and we would touch
You don’t feel me yet
But I guarantee
You’ve never met a girl like me

My fingers tingle
With the urge to take your arm
Twirl you round
Crush my lips to yours
Until our teeth cut in
And our tongues mingle
Coated in sweetest crimson
You can’t taste me yet
But I guarantee
You’ve never met a girl like me

How I long for you
To touch you, flesh to fingers
My hair spilling down
A soft Auburn caress on your chest
The sheen of sweat gleaming
Consumed by pleasures embrace
Head thrown back in ecstasy
You don’t know me yet
But I guarantee
You’ve never met a girl like me

As you begin to turn
I snatch my hand back
A blush creeps up my face
You look past me searching
I go unnoticed, not even a glance
I duck my head, moving on
Savoring how your arm brushes by mine
I really wish you knew me
But I guarantee
You’ll never meet a girl like me

And So We Meet Again, My Love

Laughing, loving, needing, wanting, giving, living…

The water is warm as we take the time to splash and play despite the danger that is coming on the horizon. We feel it will be our last day and we spend it celebrating our love together. No fear, no regrets. We have loved with a passion to match the ages and together we will stand united to die the same way we have lived, as one. We will make the final stand, outnumbered and against all odds…not that unusual for us. But this time, we know our path may end come nightfall. We leave the pool of clearest water and lay side my side in the grass, entwined in love and pleasures. The world that awaits us melts away and we revel in one last day of basking in one another’s glory. There are no tears. Only the tender smiles that light upon soft lips with gentle kisses and fevered caresses. An urgency meets our lovemaking with the dying of the light and we melt into one another, drinking down each others soul with every heated touch and gasping moan. We devour our love for one another. For tonight we will face death and as one we will conquer it without a flinching eye…for we know that we have had each other in our lives always, and we always will. We take the final steps into the jaws of hell and a fierce battle cry is echoed through both of our chests.

Our last words…my love, we will meet again! We once more unite as our lives bleed out to soak into the ground and mingle along with our last breath of air...

And so those words have echoed throughout time...one life to the next...until you came to me once more. So you see my love, we were right...we conquered death with unflinching eyes and have returned to one another's arms. This is true love that survives all, life, death, pain, joy, fear, courage...we are meant for one another as we remain together, forever united. I love you darling...forever.

Update: As She Slipped Away

To any and all that read the post I made titled "As She Slipped Away", I wish to say thank you for the kind thoughts and warm wishes. I also wished to give an update as to the condition of the girl on the table.

She is doing a good deal better! She has been moved from the ICU at the hospital and is now in a regular room until such time as a bed can be found at a proper psychiatric facility where she will be able to have her meds adjusted to more suitable levels. With that and a bit of counseling we expect her to be doing better emotionally soon, as well. She should be able to come home in the next week or week and a half.

On a side note, I asked her if she remembered any of what happened while she lay in the table and she said that she didn't but she does remember the touch of my lips on her forehead. When I told her that even though I had been unable to be there physically that I never left her side through the long dark night, she said she knew because she felt me nearby with her.

She wasn't angry with me either as I had feared she might be. She apologized profusely when I saw her and said she had tried to be strong but that she had failed. I told her that her shame wasn't necessary when it comes to me. I love her exactly as she is and nothing will ever change that. We hugged and we cried, held hands and snuggled...all of the things I had been so afraid I would never be able to do with her again. So...that was a very very good day.

My Time In The Box

I went for a few years once without feeding. Worst...thing....ever. You see at the time I wasn't aware of my vampiric nature, I had awakened years earlier but remained ignorant as to the source of my problems. Anyway, after awakening I ended up subconsciously feeding on those around me without knowing it. Eventually this caused problems on the homefront. I recall my now ex telling me at the time that he dreaded coming home because I drained the life out of him. At the time I thought he was just being cruel. lol. Well, that's not to say he wasn't...but he had a point.

One day I ended up having something of a breakdown. A part of me just plain shut down. I was tired of always feeling his disapproval and judgments so I just shut that part of me off, walled it up and packed it away in a pretty bow. It created something of a sense of empathic blindness in me in a sense. I didn't know it at the time but I had basically created a two way shield between myself and the rest of the world. Everywhere I went I would imagine myself in a metal box with no openings, tucked safely away from the hurt of the world around me. This also ended up making the subconscious feedings impossible...nothing got in that shield and nothing got out.

I spent a good couple years that way. The first thing i noticed was my immune system went way the hell downhill. I got sick a lot and often had a hard time recovering from it. I also had trouble with depression which over time became worse and worse. My health continued to deteriorate as well. Within the two year time span that time occurred I ended having to have 3 surgeries.

After the final of the three, I decided to kinda peek out of the box and see if the world was still there the way I remembered it as having been, swimming with a sea of the emotions of others. It was when I woke up from that third surgery in fact. And i found that moment I pictured an opening in that box that surrounded me, the whole thing came tumbling down and I now have the words to describe what I felt that day. In short, I didn't just feed...I feasted! I recovered from the surgery in such record breaking time that I startled the doctors whose care I was under. My lingering depression also was gone within a matter of days.

In fact, that experience was what led me to begin my journey to discover who and what I really am. I decided to research empathy and in time I quite literally stumbled across the OVC (Online Vampire Community). Since then I've learned a great deal about the things I'd experienced that I had no words to describe at the time.

As She Slipped Away

She slipped away from me last night. One moment she was there on the table getting her stomach pumped and the next…nothing. I prayed last night. The strange thing was, I wasn’t even really sure whom I was praying to. Everyone…no one, it’s all the same really. I wouldn’t say that I am one who has lost their faith. I suppose one must have faith first to lose it. I had confirmation last night of something that has lingered in my mind for some time though.

I was praying to the nebulous someone or someones out there when I felt her spirit away. And rather then become saddened or more fearful, I felt a calm wash over me for a moment. With my eyes closed I felt the pain of a part of my soul being ripped from my heart and suddenly I knew what I should do. I stopped praying and I opened my heart and soul. I took the blinding light that I carry within me and I poured it into her still and quiet body mercilessly. I pushed the essence of my being into her as I have never pushed before, with purpose and determination.

I felt the doctors working on her, bustling around like so many busy ants. None of it seemed real though. It all seemed somehow to be so far from reality that it was like a haze, a fog settling in and only one thing remained clear. The girl that lay on the table before me was a drastic contrast to the activity around her. She lay there so absently, still as death itself. For that is what had settled over her briefly, this shroud of death which clung to her like a sticky film that one can’t wash off.

I stood at the end of the bed, next to her head, watching everything with a certain detached feeling. I marveled at the fact that none of the good doctors and nurses could see me. They perhaps could sense me if they were of the sort that could pick up on such things but I had no reason to think any of them were in fact a possible sensitive, privy to the sensations of astral bodies nearby. Frantically they continued their efforts and I smiled sadly at them, knowing they were doing their best and also knowing that it wasn’t working.

I placed my hand on her head, petting her hair the way she always liked. The movements of the doctors were becoming fewer and slower as time itself seemed to slow to a crawl. A nurse held a pen in her hand and had an eye on the clock, waiting to be told when to write down the time. I looked back down at the girl on the table and leaned forward, softly laying my lips upon her cool forehead and I breathed myself into her. With every breath I poured that which is me into her. She was the vessel and I became the liquid light that filled it. I felt myself reach out and pull everything I could from every other person in the room, a collective sigh escaping their lips. My eyes unfocused and still I filled her.

A hand touched my back and I knew it was He. He then reached for her hand and lifted it to his lips, doing the same as I. Together we let our power loose on her. Shadowy figures began stepping forward, family coming forth to lend a hand. And still I pressed my breath into her with a whisper, “It is not your time, little one. You must come back. I am sorry but you cannot yet leave. Hate me if you will but you must return. We need your light.” I felt her struggling, just out of reach. Not wanting to return.

“No! It hurts too much!! I want to go! Let me go!!!”, She says to me.

My heart feels another wrenching tear and I can no longer hold myself back. I feel that part of me take over, the part I hide the most, telling few about it. The Goddess steps forth from my inner core and I feel the large red wings spread out behind me. I lift my lips from her forehead and nothing but a piercing light can be seen where once my eyes were for they have gone blind in power, but I no longer need to see to accomplish what I must.

I place a hand upon her chest, over her heart and the other hand I stretch to the heavens. With a thought and the flip of a mental switch I am touching the Source of all and I become the conduit for its power. The sensation is overwhelming and a roar tears from my throat as I withstand the extreme discomfort. He comes to my side again, wrapping his arms around me and holding me up as my knees become weak. And still we do not stop.

A slow but steady sound begins to echo at last against the stark white walls and large glass door of the somewhat small room. This is shortly followed by a startled gasp. Beep…Beep…Beep. It is an odd sound. Beep…Beep…Beep. It is not a sound made by natural means, but rather by a manmade device, which suddenly has commanded the attention of everyone in the room. All eyes are turned toward it in rapt interest. Beep…Beep…Beep. I am slumped against Him now in exhaustion but I find the strength to lift my head and open my now dim eyes once more. Upon searching for the source of the gasp, my gaze falls upon the nurse with the pen. She is no longer staring at the clock. Her eyes dart between the girl on the table and the machine next to her that continues to give its repetitive series of beeps.

“Doctor…”, her eyes are wide and she simply stares, as whatever words she would have spoken trail off and become forgotten.

The girl on the table lies there in slumber now, her heart beating out a slow, soft, steady rhythm. My line of vision flicks over to the shadowy figures of those that had approached to lend a hand. With soft, relieved smiles and a sage-like nod from the both of them, they melt from my sight into the background. He and I each take turns caressing the sleeping girl’s cheek lovingly. Exchanging a meaningful glance with one another, we too step back from the table. We quietly fade from the room, hand in hand, so that we may once more find our physical bodies where they lay miles away, in a state of deep meditation.

My eyes flutter open and my thumb absentmindedly runs back and forth over the face of the cell phone in my hand. Shortly I will receive a call bearing news. They will tell me that she is in critical but stable condition. I lay there in the darkened room, alone with my thoughts.

I wonder to myself, will she hate me? Will she even remember? Or will she awake, as anyone else would, with no knowledge of what came to pass in that hospital room while she tried to slip away. An exhausted smile touches my lips and silent tears of relief trail from my eyes as I think to myself that could perhaps ask her tomorrow. I roll from my back to my side and curl up, still deep in thought. I had always suspected that there was real power beneath the surface of what meets the eyes of most when they look upon He or I. Pity that confirmation of such things must come in such frightening packages.